3 Hard Lessons I Learned About Mental Health within my Early 20s

The topics of self-care and being a “friend to yourself” were hitting a peak at about the time I had been leaving senior high school for college. One of my first-year mandatory seminars involved the significance of mental health, accessing school therapists, and building a network of trusted peers and adults to rely on. It all seemed trivial to me, someone who had yet to have a problem with the darkness that my thoughts could conjure to torture me.

In retrospect, maybe I should've paid better attention. That same year, I experienced several depressive episodes and my first panic attack. I felt completely not able to control where my mind was headed. Being away for school, I was the furthest from family, and all of my little luxuries for that first-time. In retrospect, I was so poorly ready for those first few months. I simply couldn't know very well what was wrong beside me. Others would freshman mixers and socializing and settling into classes, and I was floating via a haze that just I saw.

Fortunately, my hall advisor within my newbie suggested counseling sessions. I hated the numbness that appeared to permeate everything I did, and I figured I had nothing to lose. I'm proud of that Princy because she steeled herself coupled with the courage to get in and talk about the vulnerabilities she never thought she'd placed on display. Due to her, I'm here, healthier, and thankful. Over time, classes, friendships, work-study, and life just appeared to make more sense in my experience. I started to savor those activities which i couldn't before, and that i was just appreciative. I found myself thankful that grass grew in between sidewalk cracks.

Can you would imagine? However when you experience depression, you'll understand the tunnel vision that can sometimes blind you to these things. I had been beginning to see the planet for its beautiful simplicity. Of course, days where I took 4 steps forward, were followed by ones where I slipped and tumbled 10 steps back. But every day since deciding to fight in my mental health continues to be easier, and the harder days have grown to be few in number.

I am writing this post, to not brag about the progress I've made or to be toxically positive. Nobody wants to hear “You can do it! I did it! Let's all do it! Things are just great! Simply do it!”. These have simply been some hard lessons which i want to document and have in my little corner of the Internet to feel hope in as well as for others for a resource in their own journey. Hopefully, hearing these things preps a little more for whatever struggle you have and have yet to face. I would like these truths to be transparent and something that will help you to realize there is more to life on the other hand of the mental illness.

1. No one can assist you to until you come to a decision that you're going to fight on your own. Pay attention to the voice inside you, the one which wants you to be well.

This can be a hard fact to take, especially for my early twenties group! This really is this type of transitionary period. You decide to go from high schooler to adult to college graduate such quick succession. And no one lets you know what it way to be your own motivator. Nobody is waking you up for school anymore, or taking you to definitely doctor's appointments. You are likely to be making what feels like life-altering decisions as well as for me, it was really overwhelming.

I remember calling my mother from school one day and declaring that I needed to come home. I needed a break. And while she didn't encourage quitting school, she was receptive to the pain and listened to the way in which I was feeling. At the end of my rant, she asked me, “Princy, if you might have this kind of open conversation with me about how exactly you are feeling, why can't you extend yourself the same courtesy and become open and honest with your feelings? Pay attention to yourself and believe that which you hear.”

After that, I began hearing myself. I knew that I needed help and to look after my health. Once you discover yourself hearing your needs, you know how to ask for help and seek helpful information on your mental health. But you need to make the choice to listen to yourself. You have to fight on your own because nobody else will help you do that.

2. Its not all “typical” milestone will probably be your ultimate goal.

You always hear that whenever a certain number of therapy sessions or perhaps a certain quantity of support group sessions, you'll achieve this or that milestone and be making clear, undeniable progress. This is hardly the case and unlike anything I experienced. I didn't spill my guts in peer groups or perhaps in therapy. I didn't awaken magically cured of my depression eventually. When my anxiety attacks occurred, I felt like I was ruining the progress I'd made in trying to improve my mental health. It was really some of the most isolating moments of my life.

My milestones were smaller, personal goals which i relished in accomplishing. Could it have been making it to breakfast or gelling a workout. Anything that stopped me from the overwhelming sense of a racing mind or a depressive state were achievements to me. And finally, the more of these stuff that I possibly could accomplish and also the more community which i developed, the less I felt pulled into those overwhelming thoughts. My goals were tailor-made to people a few things i knew I possibly could accomplish. Progressively overloading those accomplishments helped me to pave a path to my mental wellness.

3. Everything will always be alright ultimately, and when it isn't, it's not the end.

Read that again! I heard this quote a few days ago and did a double-take. I felt it summed up some of the a few things i needed to learn by coping with the dark depression. In the thick from it, nothing seems like it will be good again. And that i completely understand that, but it's a lie. There is always something to live for, something to appear forward to, and something to be alive for.

Even whether it's as little as being happy about the grass between the sidewalks, the simple truth is, that's enough. Small happiness can compound and become like a seed in your head when all that's necessary to do is surrender towards the depression. Even if you can't see it now, there is an ending where you stand healthier, stronger along with a better person for having gone through what you're going through. Keep fighting for your ending since you deserve it.